The Budge Bunch

I don’t know if it’s because I have only slept like four hours in the last three days, or because my youngest just started full day kindergarten, but I am such an emotional wreck lately.

This Summer has been a whirlwind, and I think it may have finally caught up with me.  Actually, never mind just this Summer, this year has been crazy.  Although I love everything I am doing, I am tired.  I have so much fun everyday, between the kids and working.  I know I am so lucky that I can say that.

In the craziness of our life I was also trying to live in the moment of being home with Chloe.  It was so hard for me to imagine her going to school.  This is huge.  Not just for her, but for me as well.  This is the first time in about nineteen years that I have not had a little one home with me while the kids were in school.  It is scary.  Now I am thinking of me and what to do with my life.  It is so overwhelming, but crazy exciting at the same time.

I have no idea what lies ahead for me, or for any of us.  I hope this new school will be a great fit  for Jake,  and Chloe will shine with her independent personality.  Chelsea starts her sophomore year tomorrow, and I know she will rock it like she always does.

I guess I am just hoping for a kick ass year.  Oh yeah, and maybe a little more sleep.

2 Comments | In: Chelsea, Chloe, Family, Jake, love | tags: Family, kids, love. | #

My sweet girl has her first loose tooth.  Tear my heart out.  My emotions are a wreck.  Not only is she going to loose her first tooth, today was her first day of kindergarten.  This is going to be one crazy ride, and I look so forward to it!

No Comments | In: Chloe, Family | tags: Chloe, Family, love. | #

So…my kids LOVE Fathers Day! They actually love Mothers Day, and birthdays and any day that they can do something fun and keep secrets about the presents. It is so awesome to see how excited they get when they start thinking of ideas for presents and things to do. We would be so broke if we bought or did all the cool things they want to do for their family. I love how sweet they are.

Well, you all know that I am loving my new Price Chopper that just opened this week. (I am shocked I am not the mayor on Foursquare yet) They did the cutest thing on Saturday. They let kids come in and decorate a big cookie or cake for their Dads. What a fun idea! The kids had fun making up some weird story of where we were going, and we headed out to decorate some cakes!

Jake and Chloe had a blast! The girl that helped them was amazing with them. So sweet. Everyone that was walking by thought it was such a cute idea. You really can’t beat it for five bucks each, they both got to make a cool dessert for Fathers Day. They were so proud of themselves. They couldn’t stop smiling when they brought them out after dinner. So happy to have the BIG SURPRISE!

Even happier that Daddy LOVED it and completley FREAKED out when he saw them. So cute!

2 Comments | In: Chloe, Family, Jake, love | tags: Family, love. | #

I am sitting in bed drinking coffee, watching the Today Show. (FYI, Omarosa is getting a dating show) I am checking email, and catching up on Twitter.

Next to me Chloe is sleeping. She NEVER sleeps this late. But we have had a busy week and our schedule has been all weird, and she has been staying up late. It looks like the craziness has caught up with her.

I keep looking over at her sleeping. So peaceful. So sweet. So quiet. My heart almost stops beating. I can’t believe five years have gone by so fast. There are so many things that I feel I have missed, even though I was there. Things that I feel I rushed through. Needed to just get through the day. Said “hurry up” when she wanted to stop and look in amazement at a worm in our driveway. Said “wait a minute” when she wanted to show me her new dance moves she just made up. Said “be quiet” when she was singing a made up song over and over.

Yesterday morning I was laying in bed, just about to get up. Chloe crawled into bed with me and snuggled right up. It was heaven. I thought about nothing else. I just enjoyed that moment. After a little while she whispered “Mommy, you’re the best Mommy in the world” Talk about the BEST way to start your day! It is moments like those that remind me that I don’t have to be perfect, and I never will be perfect. But I am perfect for my kids. We are one big NOT perfect family.

Chloe is the baby in the family. She is starting Kindergarten in the Fall. I am so excited for her. She cannot wait to go to school everyday, all day. She loves to learn and is crazy smart. I can’t wait for her to make friends, and tell me elaborate stories about her day. I am going to miss her. My heart aches every time I think of it.

However, these feelings are more about me, than about her. I know she will be amazing at school. Just like her two sisters and brother. All of my kids are fiercely talented. Crazy smart. Wonderful people. Even if they don’t always think they are. I am proud of each one of them. Even if I don’t say it enough, I hope they know it and feel it.

Now I have to think about my life. What do I want to do? Who am I? I will always be a Mom first, but it is now time to also move on. Do something for ME. I have been looking forward to this time in my life. Trying to find my place. Wanting to do what I love. Still wanting to be there for my kids. Trying to stay true to myself. It is a bit overwhelming. It is scary.

I am about ready to pop out another kid. For real.

Talk me down people! Any advice?

8 Comments | In: Chloe, crap in my head, love | tags: Chloe, love. | #

Today is Earth Day.  I was talking with Chloe about it, and what Earth Day means.  Things we can do as a family to help the environment.  Why it is important,  and I was asking her what were some of  her thoughts about what we should do.   She said to me:

“Today is a day we celebrate the Earth?  I love the Earth!   This is the greatest day!

We need to eat lunch outside!”

So we will.

Happy Earth Day.

No Comments | In: Chloe, love | | #

Tonight we colored some Easter eggs. Tomorrow the kids will wake up to see what the Easter Bunny left for them, and hunt for eggs in the backyard. And we will relax. It has been a very sad and busy week/weekend for our family. But tomorrow we will sleep in and have a nice dinner. We will remember the reason for the day.

No Comments | In: Chloe, Family, Jake, love | | #

Chloe in the Hospital waiting to go home!

Chloe, you are number four.

Four is a great number.

I remember when there was only three.

It didn’t seem right.  Something was missing.

There was a big empty spot in our family.

Until you were born… five years ago.

You bolted into this family with a burst of energy and that has never changed.  You make every day better, just by being you.  You are silly, smart, caring, beautiful, daring, amazing.  You make everyone smile, no matter how bad the day.  Everyday for five years.  We are a lucky family.

Watch out world here comes Chloe….

4 Comments | In: Chloe, Family, cutest kid ever, happy birthday | | #

Chloe hanging out at her cousins birthday party with icecream cake all over her face. She had a blast!

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Make sure you go over and check out Eighty MPH Mom for more great Monday Mingle videos
and to link up your own!

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