So, I am in the process of trying to wrap my head around loosing a friendship. And while I sit and obsess wonder what happened, I keep thinking about other friendships I have had in my life that just didn’t last. Even friendships that I have that are on their way out. I find myself going over everything in my head over and over. What did I do? What could I have done better? Listen more? Laugh more? Buy them Starbucks everyday? How could these friendships been saved?
Having my friendship with this particular friend end has been more painful than I would have ever thought. It feels like a breakup. I feel heart broken. I am sad. We were friends for seven years. We shared Holidays, watched each others kids. We could sit and talk for hours about anything. And we would laugh. A lot. I loved our friendship, and loved how it had grown over the years.
Unfortunately she didn’t so much. She had mentioned one time about the fact that “sometimes people can just outgrow a friend” She wasn’t talking about me at that time, but she was. Without wanting to say it. I tried to ignore it, but it was over. It is over.
I need to move on. I will move on. But it is harder than I thought. I don’t think I will ever know what she felt and what happened to change things. I guess we just grew apart, and I was just the last to know.
Have you ever been in this place with a friend? How did you get over it and move on?
Oh Cheryl. I know how this feels. I had a very dear to me bff (we even got matching tatoos) that just switched up and decided to hang out with my sister instead one day. It was just like one day we were friends and the next we weren’t. It does hurt. Especially if you have nurtured the friendship into something you love.
Maybe in the future you guys will be able to talk and find out what her feelings were. Give it a bit of time and hopefully she will be kind enough to give you some closure sooner rather than later.
Good luck! Be strong! Hope you have a great day! :)
I have had this happen many times! Some I eventually reconnect with, and some I’ve just accepted are gone for good. I think that people sometimes just come in and out of your life when they are supposed to, though it’s very hard sometimes!
Oh Cheryl. I know this feeling so well. In fact, I’ve been feeling a lot of it lately and sometimes on the other side of it too. Not trying to be all self promote-y but I wrote a post about it last Friday called “It’s not me, it’s you.” I don’t know if it will help but it explains my feelings lately about friendships. {hugs} to you.
I have gone through this recently myself. For whatever reason people decide to do their own thing and drop the friendship. One of my best friends from college did this to me and won’t return my phone calls. All I can do is move on but yeah it does kinda feel a bit like a breakup.
Thanks so much Jacque! Yes…closure would be great. I think that is what really get’s me, I have no idea what happened!
You are so right Mary…I do think people come in and out of your life for a reason and at certain times. I just wish it didn’t feel so shitty when it’s over. ;)
Thanks Fadra! Off to read your post….next time throw the link in when your promoting..make my life easier, geeze. LOL I am ready to move on and build some amazing new friendships. Can’t dwell in this negative stuff right? :)
Doesn’t it though?? It is weird, I feel all heartbroken. I think it is because of the time that was invested. Or maybe i’m just a bit weird. ;) Thanks for stopping by Tim!
Get a voodoo cow and you know, stick some pins in it.
I don’t know. I have a tendency to call myself names about how I ruined it, etc. Like a breakup, I got over it but the worst thing is we still have common friends and I am expected to be nice to her when I run into her. Grrr.
Congratulations to Maiya for wiinnng a free friends session. See you and your friends in June!