I turned 38 on Sunday.

A few years ago I would have been all bitchy about getting older, and not want to talk about my birthday. Not this year. This year is the two year anniversary of my lung collapse. February 8th actually. I will never forget laying in the hospital so scared thinking “I love my life.” It is a moment that changed me forever.

I did not care if my house was clean. I did not care if my laundry was done. I did not care that I was mad at my daughter just hours before. The only things I could think about. My family. My friends. My life. The crazy love I feel for it all. No matter how bad it can be. I love it. I wouldn’t want it any other way. I am thankful to be here to live it and to feel it. Good or bad. Of course I wish for more good than bad, but we are who we are because of all of it all.

This past year has been a rough one for me and my family. But instead of letting it consume me, I am using it to motivate me. Sometimes you need to go through the worst of the worst to find out who you really are. I did. I am stronger, and more committed to being myself and standing up for what I believe in. In all areas of my life. I am a crazy lucky person, and I know it and feel it everyday. I look so forward to another year. I am so thankful for it. Who knows what it will bring, but I think the not knowing is the best part.

Happy. Birthday. To. Me. :)